Just grumbling errrrr

Firstly, let me just laugh by myself for a bit.
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHA

I am feeling a bit depressed right now because there are a lot of things twirling in my head.
Maybe because I have been studying in Japan in an almost-serious manner for nearly 10 months but I only improve VERY LITTLE.

It is not that I do not study, I DO study but when I compare myself with my fellow classmates who are Koreans and Chinese, I seem to lack a lot of grammar points and difficult/formal vocabularies.

But right now I just want to OPENLY praise Koreans. LOL
WHY?

Because I am jealous.
Yes, when I am jealous, I praise people. Weird?
That's me!

I don't use jealousy to become the green eyed monster, creating havoc OR build up Killing Aura that can be detected 10 m radius.
Nahh.... I channel it to a good cause.

Okay, WHY DO I FEEL JEALOUS?
There is a story to this.

This morning, just as I arrived in Ryougoku Eki to board my favourite bustling crowded train (Sobu Train), a very annoying notice was displayed on the MONITOR.
It said "Sobu Sen is delayed due to Car Inspection".

So, I had to catch the Oedo Line which is beside the famous Edo-Tokyo Museum.
I was already late anyway LOL Because, well, I was just really tired from cleaning up my room the night before.

Then, I had to transfer to another train which is still on Oedo Line to reach Yoyogi Station then board on the YAMANOTE Line to reach Shibuya.

The JR trains especially Yamanote Line's Trains are installed with TV Screens just above the exit door.
These screens function as TV INFO for us the standing passengers, sitting passengers, the pregnant ladies, the little kids who sleep on the train, the dozing off salarymen, the Office Ladies, the Gyaru (those thick make-up girls), and of course the Foreigners like me known as gaikokujin/gaijin. LOL

Anyway, the TV shows you the Today's Weather, Sport News (like baseball/Sumo), Politics, advertisement, the Yamanote Line Route, and lastly interesting LANGUAGE WORDS in Korean and Chinese.

It is not surprising because Japan's neighbouring countries are Taiwan China and Korea.
They speak.... Mandarin Chinese and Korean.

Now Now, this morning they were showing the Korean version of 4 words that are INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and I was just Swearing my Ass off in the "heart" :P You think I will write "in the train? NO NO NO NO. . . bad readers :p" hahaha LOL

I was like "WTH, WAT... DA... (*)*W*E)*W)*)(*)W*E)W)*E&W)&(*&(&@)(*@&(*... so similar! No wonder it is very easy for them to grasp words due to the many similarities between the two languages!"

Plus, it is known in Japan that Korean students learn Japanese the fastest EVEN THOUGH Chinese/Taiwanese can read Kanji (read: can UNderstand the Kanji but usually not the spelling even though sometimes quite similar).

And I have to agree!
For example, as an Indonesian, I realise that many of Indonesian words can be quite similar to English, our grammar structure and our lack of particles are very much alike to English.
I do not have much problem with English except for past, present and future tenses LOLLLLLL

Oh well, deal with it.

Okay, continue...
So yes, that is why I am so jealous.
And to even stress how good the Koreans are is when the teachers start asking the Korean students MORE than the other students because they usually can answer the teachers with perfect grammar and structure!

Intervention: Hey, if you think I AM JEALOUS, did u just read that I AM JEALOUS above?
Read the above part again!

In the class, apart from this Finnish gentleman (and mind you, the Finnish language grammar is the same as Japanese but they're just lacking the vocabularies/spelling unlike the Korean language which are very similar), only me who comes from an English speaking/English-similar-grammar-Indonesian-speaking woman.

It is incredible how I can survive and move up my ass to the advance class before moving to the Business Class.
Yeah, if you know how I struggled!!!
I practically FAILED ALMOST ALL SECTION but of course only one per one final test. LOL
So I've failed my listening, my interview, my essay, my grammar test, my reading test but all in different time.
LOL

Cool huh? LOL
I do not know if this is something to be proud of, because up till now the people who are in the Advance level are usually Koreans and Chinese.
One Russian (Europeans are good with languages ;) has lived in Japan for 10 years and she is kind of a translator so we know she is good.

Apart from her, the other Western background students in the Advance level are usually the people who have worked and lived in Japan.

So I guess I should not be looking down too much on my self right?

Well, I guess my rambling is finished.

I only want to become GOOD in Japanese, able to UNDERSTAND the society, the language, the way they think, but of course, if I can do all that maybe I have already become a Japanese. LOL

This imperfection that resides in me is not that bad actually.
Because I know what most people envy about me in all of my classes that I've taken.

They all envy my bubbly personality and my beautiful intonations (spelling). LOL

So yeah, it is not that bad.

In the meanwhile, I want to do my best now and keep on praying so that God can give me strength to turn this jealousy as a whip for me to work harder.

There IS ALWAYS a limit in someone, but even though you can not do something with that limit, you can ALWAYS work on the things WITHIN THAT LIMIT TO THE MAX.

So, let's do it and.... oops, I am opening my homework now hahahahaha

Okay, thanks for reading my Jealousy blog today lol

Have a nice weekend.
Love,
SASA

XOXO

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